Black Roses Die
by Seren McGowan
Summary: They are not evil. They never were. They were just lost, and maybe they still are. "This is the journey that shows how, while trying to make their way through a valley of thorns, the Black roses die."
1. Prologue

**Authoress notes:** Hi! Well, first of all, this story is not compeletely mine. It's written in colaboration with Yuki-Neko and Lenore. Each chapter is divided in three parts, first part is the story told in Narcissa's point of view (written by me) second part is told in Andromeda's point of view (written by Yuki-Neko) and third part is told in Bellatrix's point of view (written by Lenore)

We begun writing it because we realized there was a lot of potential in the Black sister's backround, and that Rowling didn't exploit it nearly enough. The original story is written in spanish, so I'll try to translate the chapters as fast as I can, and upload one a day if possible. Since english is not my first lenguage, it'll be great if someone wanted to be my beta for this story.

Well, all that said, I hope you enjoy reading our version of the sister's story as much as we enoyed writing it.

Everything belongs to Rowling, except the plot!

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**Black Roses Die**

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_Blackened heart, blackened soul, netherlife. All I am, all I feel, all I see…Black roses die..._

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Roses. Nature's most sweet and dangerous flowers. At first sight, they're beautiful, seductive and soft. They invite you to come close and grab them, everyone who sees them would like to brag about having them in their garden, and they invite them, with their delicate shine, to come closer.

Then, once you've approached them and you extend your hand to cut one, it's thorns stick in your skin like daggers, they hurt, they harm, they make you bleed of hurt and frustration, all their beauty stains blood red, and, at the end, the careless person whom tried to grab them realize they're unattainable.

Even though, even this unattainable roses, whom are perfect on the outside, hide secrets, and every one of their thorns is a story of pain and tragedy that led them to where they are.

As free as they seem, roses, when you lock them up, loose their beauty slowly, the number of thorns increase until they reach the point when no one can grab them anymore, no one can take them out back to the light and save them. When this roses find themselves trapped, abandoned, they wilt, their vivid color die and turns to black, and that's how, of being beautiful and brilliant, the roses end up being black, sad and, slowly, finally, black roses die.

This is the story of three roses, the most beautiful, the most brilliant, whom were obliged to grow in a world that didn't understand them, in a world that tried to destroy them, in a world that, slowly, ended up consuming them.

This is the story of the tree Black sisters, the story of how the love to pureblood ended up killing the life of the three most beautiful and pure creatures.

This is the journey that shows how, trying to make their way through a valley of thorns, the Black roses die.

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_From the night I betrayed my world. And myself. I still feel the flames.  
Burned! Scarred!  
What is left of me? What remains?_

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Lyrics are taken from Dungeon's Netherlife and Insanity's fall. Review and let me know if you like the idea son I can continue updating!!


	2. Narcissa

**Authoress notes: **Hey everyone! I wanted to say thank you to Melanie, who reviewed the prologue, and to xoxLewrahxox, who not only reviewed, but was kind enough to become my beta for this story. Thanks!!!!  
I hope I can thank more people on next chapter!!

Now get confortable, and enjoy the ride!!

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**Chapter 1: Ice Princess doesn't speak, but she feels. **

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""_I love you Andy, we'll always be sisters" Mi heart screamed it, it begged me to tell her, it threatened to jump of my chest if I didn't. But I'm a Black. So I said nothing."_

When the train stopped at Hogsmade station I didn't make any movement to get outof my compartment. I stayed in silence, watching how the cohort of climbers I called my friends stumbled off the train.

It's strange. When I first came to Hogwarts, my sisters came with me on the train. We went in the same carriage, and we remained together in the Great Hall. Now, we separated at platform 9 ¾, and I hadn't seen them since then.

It's not that it bothered me, I'm already thirteen. We couldn't always betogether…but, staring at the people that surrounded me, I couldn't help but miss them.

I didn't notice there was someone else in the compartment, and when he cleared his throat. I knew it was him, and a smile bloomed on my lips. He was the only person (apart from my sisters) that I could stand at this school.

"If you stay inside the compartment, I can guarantee you that the train will leave with you still on it."He said, leaning on the doorframe, and staring at me as if I were a child.

"I was waiting for you, Sev. The least you could do is tell me you missed me during vacations." I answered, standing up and grabbing my things.

We didn't talk as we descended from the train, and as we climbed ontothe carriage. I liked being able to enjoy his company in silence, as if there was no one else around us.

And it was then, when we were finally alone, sitting in a carriage on our way to Hogwarts, when he leaned slightly, closer to my ear, and whispered.

"I missed you during vacations, Cissa."

I couldn't suppress a smile. Severus Snape always managed to lighten up my day.

When we entered the Great Hall I passed by Bella, whom exited craftily through a corner, she though I didn't know where she was heading, but I knew. Lucius had been trying to convince me to join that Dark Lord for a long time now. But as long as I had strength to keep resisting my husband to be, I would.

I thought I should stop Bella, tell her that it wasn't right, that the Dark Lord and his followers were deceiving her.

But I didn't. I remained silent as always. It was not my place to tell my older sister what she could and couldn't do, and even though I did what I had to. I couldn't help but think that I'm letting Bella lose herself in a dark road that she shouldn't travel alone. I know that every time I don't speak, our bond breaks a little more.

I tried to shove these thoughts to a corner of my mind as hard as I could -well, at least during dinner.

I hated the great hall. Being surrounded by all that people disgusted me, and Lucius…if I could lock myself on a tower just to never see him again, I would. Maybe because of that, when I felt his gaze upon me I couldn't help but grimace.

"Don't let him get to you." Murmured Severus. "You still have time to get rid of him."

I kissed Severus's cheek then, without thinking. I was conscious that the whole table were staring at us, I could feel Lucius 's angry glare. Severus tensed and frowned, and I simply didn't care.

That night, on my way to the common room, Andromeda stopped me in the corridor, so I let my cohort walk away without bothering to tell them I was staying behind.

"Goodnight, Andy." I said, smiling politely. That was what we had turned into; formal greetings, and polite conversations. I loved my sisters, more than anyone, but above all, we were Black.

"How's the trip been, Cissa? I've seen you're still glued to Snape." She said, eyebrows arched. "If you don't dare to break your engagement with Lucius. At least don't go fooling around with others, Cissa, at the end it will be worse for you."

She sounded worried. I knew Andy only wanted to protect me, and I knew that if I kept going on like that I would end up hurt. Maybe if I had said that, everything would have been fine, but I didn't, because I was a Black.

"I'm not as strong as you, Andy. I know my place, it's a shame you don't accept yours." I stared at her for a second, impassive.-"The trip was good, I hope yours was too."

When her expression changed from confusion to disguised hurt. I instantly regretted not telling her that I appreciated her preocupation, and that I myself was worried about her, but what did she know, of the fear of not being what they expected me to be? Andy, always the rebel, doing what she wants, and taking the blame for it. She couldn't care less about her blood, and her family. I'm not like that. I can't, I'm not that strong.

"I love you Andy, and we will always be sisters" My heart screamed it, begged me to tell her. It threatened to jump of my chest if I didn't, yet I'm a Black, and if Andy doesn't understand soon that she is one too, she will suffer. I don't wan't Andy to suffer.

I walked away without another word and continued my way to the common room, leaving her standing there. She may have been thinking the same thing I was: "What happened to us?"

I arrived at the common room, and I let myself fall on a sofa, staring at the ceiling. Bella and Andy crossed my mind in a whirlwind, and Severus, Lucius too, and everything I couldn't control.

I felt it when someone sat on the arm of the sofa, and I recognized him because of the soft smell of potion ingredients. I stood up and sat down again, leaning against him and resting my head on his shoulder.

"You don't have to change, you know. Only understand what is important." Sev told me, caressing my hair so very softly.

I don't know what time it was when we said goodnight. I don't know what time did I fell asleep eider, but I know that that night I dreamt about threads that were cut and black roses that wilted. If I believed in premonitory dreams, I would be afraid.

It's strange, because I don't believe in them, yet I am still scared.

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**Seren McGowan~~**

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	3. Andrómeda

**Authoress notes:** _Hi!!! I'm sorry this chapter took this long . I promise to try and translate Bella's faster! I wanted to thank Melanie, and , whom reviewed chapter 1!, and thanks for all the favs and the alerts (you can review too! xD) and, a very special thank you to __xoxLewrahxox__, my beta for this story, who's helping me a lot!!!!_

_Now, lean back, relax, and enjoy!_

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**Chapter 1: Bravery Is Nothing But The Reflection Of Fear.**

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"_Gryffindor's are brave, yet brave people don't fear anything …Why am I here ? Why am I a Gryffindor? If I were a Slytherin would things be any different?"_

1st September had finally arrived, the train had stopped at Hogsmade station, and Hogwarts was just a wands touch away.

I sat with my friends on the train, and they noted the happiness I felt at the thought of going back to the castle.

They were a varied group of young witches, most of whom were Gryffindors, like me, and the rest were a mixture of Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs, yet they were no Slytherins.

The competition between Gryffindor and Slytherin separated people who were once friends, or could have been. Yet, that rivalry would never separate the Black sisters, of course.

I was finally with people who I was able to talk to freely without the fear of being told off. I was also in the presence of people that I liked as in the Noble and Ancient House of Black they were very few family members that I actually had any affection towards. They were my sisters, and my beloved cousin Sirius.

I cared very little about the other people in my family.

Stepping off the train, and onto the platform, my friends spoke happily about their vacations. They also talked about the changes of one another over the summer such as: new hairstyles, a new set of robes and growing taller.

I scanned the crowd to see if I could spot Cissa's long blonde hair or the signature gaze that Bellatrix possessed.

I saw neither of them, and I'm not ashamed to say that I was worried.

A friend and I got on the first empty carriage we found, and a group of guys from Hufflepuff joined us much to my distaste.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against Hufflepuff's…just against _him._

-Good evening.- I said to the group in general.

They just smiled in reply.

I played quidditch and was one of the Gryffindor's chasers. Sitting in front of me, brown eyes gleaming devishly, and a half smirk playing on his lips was the Hufflepuff's keeper: Ted Tonks.

I don't hate him, I do not. I just…dislike him. A lot.

-Good Evening Dromeda.- He said.

I know I'm a Black, and most of all a lady, but sometimes I simply can't control my temper.

-I don't remember giving you permission to address me by my name. Let alone, greeting me by a nickname.-

-I though the Blacks didn't lower themselves to talk to muggleborns.-He said in mock surprise. -I am honored.

I raised my middle finger at him. I shouldn't have. A perfect Black wouldn't do that. Narcissa wouldn't do that, and Bellatrix certainly wouldn't.

-I though you were elegant and graceful like your sisters, Dromeda.

-Yes, and I thought Hufflepufs had a little more intelligence.- I murmured.

-Excuse me?- He pretended he couldn't hear me, and that was evident by the smile that had flickered across his face.

-You're unbearable.- I snarled, and he just laughed.

Definately, not how a Black should behave.

When I entered the Great Hall I didn't go straight to my table. Instead I headed to Slytherin's. Bella was there, and surrounded by most of the Slytherin guys that were high up in society. Most of the girls envied her at Hogwarts. Not only because she could have any man she wanted, but because she was cold, strong, and felt nothing for any of them. For Bella, men were nothing but toys

The Lestranges were with her, and it was apparent that Bella didn't like them at all. Lucius Malfoy was there too and he was Narcissa's fiancée. I felt sorry for her. I didn't accept any kind of arranged marriage, yet Cissy had to because I didn't. Did that mean I was selfish?

I approached Bella, and placed a hand on her shoulder. She didn't look up because she knew it was me.

-Is something wrong, Andromeda?- Her tone was like always. It was as if it was just a mere question to her.. like: "Could you pass me the milk please?" No genuine concern lay within in her tone. It seemed as if she didn't want me to be there at all.

The rest of the table were staring at us. It was not normal for Bellatrix Black to speak to someone who was not a Slytherin, yet we are sisters. We're Blacks. Nothing can change that.

-Where were you? You disappeared when we were at the train station.- I knew that Bella had an habit of disappearing from time to time, and I had to confess that it worried me.

-I was nowhere, and it is none of your concern if I was."- She turned to stare at me.-Did you want something of importance?"

I wanted to sit with my sisters on the train. Though, Would that be too childish? Would I look like a coward for not being able to survive without Bella's protection? I can't be a coward can I? I mean... The Sorting Hat placed me in Gryffindor after all.

-Nothing, I just…wanted to ask how your trip was.- Bella had the ability to leave me speechless within a few seconds of speaking to her. In front of other people, she was a lot more colder than she usually was. Or simply "she was"? I don't know. The sisterly relationship between her and myself is changing dramatically.

She made a gesture that indicated that she didn't believe me. I sighed, but before I could turn to leave, Malfoy spoke:

-Don't you think that you're to old too be chasing your sister all the time? Oh, and please don't get too close as you bring the smell of those mudbloods you are friends with.-

I wanted to hit him. I should have exploded at his last comment. The usual sarcastic words of him and Rodolphus made me lose patience quickly, yet I didn't. I'm not strong enough to speak my true thoughts like Bella, and I cannot just take it and stay silent like Cissa. I can pretend I'm strong, but inside I am really scared.

-It's not your business, Malfoy.- I spat, my words laced with hate and venom.

Malfoy simply crossed his arms, and smiled triumphantly at me. He waited for me to say something else.

-Lucius, apologise to her.- Bellatrix said in an icy tone which led everyone on the Slytherin table to silence.

-Excuse me?- Asked the astounded blond.

Bella smiled, and I felt more secure. Bella always defended me. Even if I tried to be independent, and deal with it myself. .

I admired her. She was the strongest and the oldest Black sister

I never understood why he did it, but the fact that Lucius Malfoy was engaged to Narcissa, and did always what Bellatrix wanted really scared me.

-I…I apologize, Andromeda.- He murmured, his voice barely audible.

Bella was there, and I felt like I could push my luck a little.

-Sorry? I didn't hear you, Lucius.- I smiled brightly at him.

-I'm sorry.- He said, avoiding my gaze and making me laugh. I wish I was this strong when I was alone.

I was already halfway to my table when I spotted Narcissa sitting next to Snape at the other end of Slytherin's table. She was so intrigued by him that she hadn't even noticed my encounter with Lucius, or me being at her table at all. I knew I should speak to her and tell her to keep her distance with Snape, whom was not only a year younger, but a half-blood. And she was marrying Lucius…

I decided it was time for me to play big sister with Cissa, for once.

I followed her when we exited the Great Hall, and she stopped and turned to me when I called her name.

-Good night, Andy.--Her voice was soft and calm.

-How's the trip been, Cissa? I saw that you are still glued to Snape.-- Okay, maybe not the best tactic, and that was definitely not the best way to start the conversation, but I just couldn't help it. I knew Cissa had grown silent and distant over the years, but I had to warn her. She is my sister - If you don't dare call off your engagement with Lucius. At least, don't fool around with others. At the end it will be worse for you.

I wanted to tell her that she would end up suffering, but who tells Narcissa, perfect daughter of the Black family and future wife of a Malfoy that she'll suffer if she befriends another guy?

She stared at me as if she understood, or at least that's what I wanted to see. She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, the little Cissa I loved was gone, and the arrogance in her eyes was purely Black. Did I imagine it, or was little Cissa still in there, somewhere?

-I'm not as strong as you are, Andy.- She told me. Strong? Me? Me whom throws the stone and hides the hand. I, who needed Bella to confront even a rat like Malfoy…Me, the weakest of us three.- I know my place, it's a shame you don't accept yours.- Her voice was soft, she didn't bother raising it.- The trip was fine.I hope yours was too

-Mine was…good.-

We both stared at one another. It was clear that something was going on with us lately. It's true that Cissa was never the most affectionate girl in the world, but now she was cold like she was jailed inside herself. It scared me, not only because of Cissa, but because of me. The idea of ending up like her scared the hell out of me.

I went back to Gryffiindor common room and headed straight to my room. My friends were chatting, but I fell on my bed and closed the canopies.

-Gryffindor's are brave, yet brave people don't fear anything…Why am I here? Why am I a Gryffindor? If I were a Slytherin would things be any different?

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**Yuki Neko~~**

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	4. Bellatrix

**Notes:** _Hi!!! I'm sorry I took so long to translate this chapter, but it I think Bellatrix's chapters are particularly long! Yuki Neko send's her thnnk you's to all the people who reviewed last chapter, as so do I! We love that you're enjoying the story!. Thanks to __xoxLewrahxox__  
who is a wonderful beta!_

_Now, enjoy the show!_

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**Chapter 1: Darkness Is The Demon That Takes Over Me.**

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"_Now tell me, Bellatrix…have you ever felt as if you didn't own your life? That you would like to have more power, and make everyone respect you? Maybe even fear you?"_

September 1st. Another year in the thick walls of Hogwarts…Is it for my luck, or my misfortune? It was my last year it would be different from all the rest.

I remember when I first arrived at this place, innocent and wanting to learn. I yearned to explore. I was excited to say the least, to meet the sons of the richest and most prestigious wizards. I was eleven then. How foolish was I? Now I'm seventeen and everything has changed. I've learned to treat the world how it deserves and to not let me be manipulated by anyone.

I can't remember the last time I laughed, nor the last time I cried. Hogwarts has changed me. Each year that has passed, I lost a little bit of who I was, and became more like who I am.

Sometimes, when I think about it I wish I could run to the forest and scream "I want my innocence back" Yet, then I wonder if I even had it in the first place. I have come to think that I was always a cold hearted bitch ever since I was young.

We had just arrived to Hogwarts. In the train I hadn't talked to anyone, and had spent the trip alone, just staring through the window. It's strange that with all these people I can actually spend some time alone, but I know the effect I have on people. Anyone who comes near me knows that by the expression which lingers on Bellatrix Black's face she does not wish to have company, and they left without hesitation.

The only two people I would like to have by my side are my sisters, but I lost them the moment we climbed to the train. No...I didn't lose them. I walked away. Sometimes, I feel that being alone comes as an impulse that I can't control.

To my disgrace, I wasn't able to sit alone in the carriage, so I sat surrounded by various Slytherins as we made our way towards the castle. Among them: Lucius Malfoy (Narcissa's insufferable fiancée) He wouldn't think twice about cheating on her, or hurting her, believe me, I know.

I hated the idea of my little sister marrying someone like him, but I was not about to try and prevent it. I was tired of being always in the middle of my sister's problems even though they are the only ones I care about.

"Bellatrix." Malfoy spoke to me, smirking. "I'd like to meet you by the lake tonight; I have something important to tell you…" He had the indecency of making a proposition like that in front of the rest of the people in the carriage.

"Forget it, Malfoy." I answered. Oh, poor Narcissa…

"It's not what you're thinking, Black." He frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. "It is something that will interest you."

"You have nothing to offer that I would find mildly interesting."

"I think you would, and you know what it is. Haven't you received anything these holidays?" He leaned in, and whispered the last sentence in my ear.

His blue eyes darkened, and I understood. I knew what he was talking about. I had received notices about Him on holidays like he had.

I nodded as we descended from the carriage.

The moment of the day I hated the most in Hogwarts was dinner. The Great Hall was crowded and there were too many people. I sat between Malfoy and Rodolphus Lestrange (my filthy fiancée whom I loathed greatly.) I accepted the marriage arrangement just because I didn't want to disappoint my parents. They only wanted their daughters to be married to pure bloods and keep the pureblood line clean. Maybe it's their fault I hate muggleborns.

My parents are foolish. They really believe that I'm innocent and pure and that I will remain that way until I marry Rodolphus. I am nobody's property. I belong to no one and I never will. I've always done what I wanted, and I have to admit that I liked sexual games enough to jump from bed to bed.

I don't remember when I lost it, but when I turned fifteen, I was not a virgin anymore.

I hardly remember the names of the guys that passed by my bed, and I don't really care. The only thing I remember of those encounters is that I felt a little less empty.

So only one thing was clear, I'd sleep with anyone, but not Rodolphus Lestrange.

I was lost in thought when I felt a hand my shoulder. I didn't have to turn to see who it was. I simply knew, by the way she touched me; Andromeda.

She said she just wanted to talk, and I knew that it was not the case. Andromeda doesn't know what it is like not to have an older sister that looks after her. I spoiled her, protecting her from everything, but I couldn't help it.

She's my sister.

Now I would like to just ignore her, so she'll have to stand up for her own, but I know I can't.

Just like this time, when Lucius insulted her.

There are few things that are sacred, and my sisters are one of them.

"Lucius, Apologize to her." I ordered him.

I knew he would do it; Lucius had that strange habit of always doing as I said, but I'm yet to figure out why.

Andromeda left, probably to look for Narcissa, and I was tempted to call after her, but I didn't. She was my sister, but I didn't need her as much as she needed me, or so I liked to believe.

Narcissa: I was worried about her too. She was getting too close to Severus Snape, even knowing she was engaged to Lucius. I understand because in her place I would even run away with Snape so I wouldn't have to marry Lucius, but I know what would happen if Narcissa dared to break the engagement. The Black's would disown her, and I would have to do the same...

My sister,my sisters.

When night fell, and everyone headed to their rooms, I stayed behind. I had something more important to do. I headed to the lake, and it was deserted.

I could only hear the wind blowing. It was cold, and it sent shivers to my bones. But It didn't bother me because I was always cold, too cold…

I searched for Lucius's blond hair, but I saw nothing, no one. Then two hands landed on my shoulders, and I jumped, turning around and frowning.

"I'm glad you came." Lucius greeted me with an arrogant half smile plastered on his lips.

"I don't want to lose my time with you so, let's get to the point. " I said, shoving him aside and walking away.

"Don't be such a savage, Bellatrix, that's not appropriate for a Black." He replied.

"That's why you're marrying Narcissa." _Remember her, Lucius, don't forget._ "She's the only one who could stand you more than a minute without breaking your nose."

Lucius just stared at me. His eyes turned steadily darker, and his gaze began to get more intense.

"Follow me!" He told me. Following him towards the Forbidden Forest, I felt the familiar feeling of excitement running up my spine.

We walked through the forest, Lucius seemed scared of the noises, but he kept walking with his eyes focused on the path before him.

"Oh, don't be a kid." I murmured, and received a grunt for reply.

He stopped suddenly and turned to look at me.

"It's here." He crossed his arms and glanced at the shadowy trees that surrounded us.

"What now?" I asked, growing impatient. I thought I was going to meet Him, and…

"Now tell me, Bellatrix…have you ever felt as if you didn't own your life? That you would like to have more power, and make everyone respect you? Maybe even fear you?"

His questions echoed in my head, and I suddenly felt dizzy. This was all that I had wanted since I was a child.

He was coming for me, I could feel him…

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**_Lenore~~_**


	5. 2,Narcissa

**Authoress notes:** Hey!!! I'm sorry this chapter took so long to upload! My internet has been down for a while, so I wasn't able to send it to by beta or upload it, but now that it's back, here you have the chapter!  
Also -an feeling very sorry- I won't upload another chapter until I recieve at least tree reviews for this one, just to know that there's actually people reading the story xD

Thanks to xoxLewrahxox who is an amazing beta and is helping me a lot with this story!!

Well, without more delay, enjoy!

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**Chapter 2: Foreign to herself**

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_"Bella, is there something that you want to tell me?" Please, Bella, I'm here, I want to help you. Tell me "…because if you have nothing important to say then I must go to class."_

The first day of class was never something which I liked. Mostly, it was because everyone hoped to have the time to talk to me about their vacations, trying to gain themselves a spot on the fabulous world of the Princess Black. Yes, I don't understand why yet, but since I came to Hogwarts, my popularity has been rising progressively, to the point where everyone wants to be related to me.

Why am I going to fool anyone? I don't like people; most of them bother me and are too noisy for my liking. Maybe that's the reason I felt attracted to Sev the moment I saw him, he was quiet, everything in him emanated darkness and torment, and for someone like me, that was the closest to feeling peace I could ever get.

_It was my second year; I was waiting for Bella in the common room, which was full of first years talking excitedly about their first day at Hogwarts. I had been one of them last year. A lot of people from my year had approached me already, but I had politely shoved them away. I had spent the whole last year making excuses, so that they would leave, and I expected to do the same this year. Unwillingly, I had created myself fame of being Slytherin's Ice princess, too self-centered to talk to anyone._

_And then I saw him, sitting on a sofa, at the far-side corner of the room, reading a book. Lovecraft, if I remember well._  
_I approached him and sat on the sofa across from his. He didn't talk to me nor did he look at me at first, and when he did, his gaze was completely different from everyone else's.Ç  
_  
"_What are you reading?" I asked him, raising an eyebrow and leaning closer to him._

_He raised his eyes from the book to look at me, the pale face framed by the straight black hair, onyx eyes fixed on me, like if I were nobody of importance._"_What do you want?" He huffed frowning at me._

"_I asked you." I held his gaze. "What were you reading?"_

_He stared at me again; he seemed intrigued, but reluctant._

_He whispered something in a rough tone that was barely audible. I took a glance at the front of the book. _

"_I prefer the Myths of Cthullhu." I smiled slightly at him; I still knew how to smile back then. Imagine a God that didn't care about blood or status, only power._

_I had finally caught his attention; he stared at me more intensely, marked the page where he was reading, closed the book and put it aside, shifting in his couch to a more comfortable position._

_Severus listened all night as I talked, sometimes asking questions or bringing up topics of his own, at the beginning he barely even talked, but as time went by I realized that in all Hogwarts, or even in all the world, I would never find anyone like him._

_Since that night, we were always together. Severus became my dear best friend, mine forever, who only cared about me…_

How I miss those days…

When I exited my first class, I was still half asleep, the girls that surrounded me didn't stop asking me about Lucius and my engagement. They commented on how good we were for each other, everything was so perfect…

Then the object of their musings appeared, he was surrounded by his bullies and wore that arrogant smirk of his. It irritated me to no end.

He approached me and tried to kiss my lips, but I turned my face just in time so his kiss landed on my cheek.

"Don't be so feisty, Narcissa." He laughed, caressing a strand of my blonde hair with a freezing hand. "You should begin to accept the idea that sooner or later we will begin to spend a lot of time together."

God, arrogant bastard. I wanted nothing more than to whip that smile of his face, I wanted to hit him, scream at him to leave me alone. "_What are you doing, Narcissa? Stop thinking and tell him already. Tell him to leave you alone! Tell him!"_

"I would prefer it to be later than sooner…"

My mind screamed again. Was that all? That pathetic excuse of an answer? But I felt strange, like if I wasn't in control of my actions anymore, just like when I didn't tell Andy what I thought, just like I didn't stop Bella from entering that dark path. What's wrong with me? Am I really this docile? Does it really matter so little how I feel and what I think? This…this is not me!

Lucius was telling me something. Leaned closer to me, his cold breath ticked my ear, but I stopped paying him attention the moment I heard Potter's insufferable voice. Every time he said something as stupid, I knew that he was insulting Severus. I walked away from Lucius, and I think he was still speaking to me, but who cares?

I stood in front of Severus. Potter and his bunch of blood traitors (including my cousin Sirius) had him trapped and didn't let him out of the class.

My back facing them, I smiled at Severus.

"You were taking too long, I was waiting for you." I said.

"I...I got distracted." He murmured, apparently unsure.

Then I felt a hand on my shoulder, and when I spun around, I found myself facing Potter himself, he was staring at me with that same arrogant smirk, same as Lucius's, same as my father's…

"We were playing with Snivelus, Black; it's not polite to interrupt." He said, smiling with his eyes drifting slightly from my face to my body.

My expression didn't change, my voice level didn't rise. I knew I was beautiful, I was totally aware of the looks the guys sent me, and I couldn't care less.

I was a Black, I was supposed to be beautiful.

"You were there?" I answered him, my voice as innocent as I could manage."I'm sorry, sometimes I walk by the scum and I don't even notice it's there." I stared at him with eyes cold and a faux smile."Now, if you don't mind, Severus and I have to go to study."

I grabbed Severus's hand and I dragged him out of the circle of people that had gathered around us. Later that day, I found out that Lucius had hexed Potter and warned him not to touch me again. I hated him a little less for a while.

Severus and I sat in the garden, with our books on the grass. We remained silent for a moment until I finally broke the ice.

"Why was Potter bothering you this time?" I asked him, playing with a strand of my long blonde hair.

"Because Evans chose to sit with me during class." He answered, staring somewhere else and grabbing a book from his bag.

"She is a mudblood." I didn't need to say anything else, nothing could be worse than that, and I hoped Severus would understand it.

He nodded and lay down, resting his head on my lap, the book in his hands, and begun to read out loud, even though his voice was always like a whisper. Lovecraft's _The Necronomicón. _We stayed there until lunch time ended and we both had to go to class.

As I climbed up the stairs, I saw Bella staring through a window to the Forbidden Forest.

I approached her and stood by her side.

"Something interesting?" I asked, following her gaze.

"Actually, yes." She answered, not looking at me. "I saw my younger sister share a pathetic romantic scene with a half-breed, just after having provoked a fight that ended with Lucius and that blood traitor of Potter in detention.

I dropped my gaze and fixed it on the stones in the floor. I don't know why, but the tone of Bella's words always makes me feel guilty. I wanted to tell her that it hadn't been my fault, that I could do whatever I wanted with whomever I pleased and she had nothing to say to me

"Severus is my friend, Bella. He's the only one I have and I don't want to lose him." I didn't say anything else, and the worst part is that it sounded like an excuse.

Bella stared at me with a serious expression, her eyes bore into mine and her tone became soft, just for an instant.

"Cissa, remain pure forever" She put a hand on my shoulder. " It doesn't matter if Andromeda or I change, but you remain pure, just like now, pure, so we can have a place to go back to if we get lost."

For a moment, I thought I heard a plea in her voice, like if she was lost and scared, and I wanted to hug her. The she changed again.

"Bella, is there something that you want to tell me?" _Please, Bella, I'm here, I want to help you. Tell me "…_because if you have nothing important to say then I must go to class."

That was not what I wanted to say, and I know that later I'll regret it and probably cry about it.

Bella's eyes hardened.

"You're going to marry Malfoy whether you want to or not, so grow up already and stop playing boyfriends and girlfriends with your friend the half-breed." Her tone was cold and hard.

When Bella left, I begun walking as if lost in another world, I think I crossed paths with Andy and a big group of Gryffindors, but I didn't stop to check, I walked as fast as I could without losing my composure, until I reached the spot under a staircase. There, alone in the dark corner, I cried.

I don't remember what class I missed, but I cried for what seemed like hours. Why did I say all those things that I didn't mean? Why couldn't I just say what I think? Slowly, resignation was taking over me; I was losing the essence of what I am. The ice princess was turning into ice for real, and I, I felt totally foreign to myself.

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**_Seren McGowan~~_**

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	6. 2,Andromeda

**Authoress notes:** Hi!!! I am really REALLY sorry for the delay!! I have recieved even more reviews for this story that I imagined it could get (and that makes us, the three autoresses VERY VERY happy!), and I hope you all keep reading even if I take this long to update! My beta and I, we both have been busy with schoolwork, but I hope I can translate next chapter sooner! Again, I will upload it whern I get to the five reviews (and I'll try to upload it rigth away ) So, no more talking!!!

As allways, special thanks to xoxLewrahxox, because she allways finds time for this, even with all the schoolwork, and it helps me a lot!!

Merry christmass to y'all and enjoy!!!

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**Chapter 2: ****Raise your voice**

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"_Then, something unexpected happened…I couldn't help the tears that fell from my eyes, not only because it was Ted Ton__ks hugging me, but because I realized I couldn't remember the last time I had been hugged."_

The first day of school is always fun. Yes, fun, can't a Black have fun?

It all began at Gryffindor's common room, where Sirius and his friends were laughing at something they had done to some first year kids. I never did figure out what it was, but I can't deny that I ended up laughing too, when I saw the hair of the brats changing colour.

"Morning, Sirius. " I greeted him as I descended the stairs that leaded to the girl's dorms. " Isn't it a little bit early?"

He smiled at me; that rogue smile that was all his.

"You know it is never too early for us"

That was true. He and Potter were always like that, it was an everyday thing. If they weren't in detention at least once a week, people started to worry.

"Sweet Andromeda, is the only Black with a sense of humor." Pointed out Potter, imitating my cousin's smile.

Uh uh…I didn't trust them one bit. " Just stay away from me, ok ? and have a good day." I had to keep my reputation untouched, everyone though that Andromeda Black, despite her occasional rebellions was a good student.

I had almost reached my table in the Great Hall when a voice made me stop on my tracks.

"Mornin, Dromeda."

"Good morning, -."

Gosh! –Fuc*ing Tonks. I jumped when I realized whom exactly I was talking to, and with no further thought, I left right away, walking towards the table my friends were sitting in.

Potions class was next, and it went on without any problems, well, maybe there was some, but not worth mentioning.

I had two hours of herbology next. This was our OWLS year, but I had decided to take it calmly.

During class, I had time to think about my current situation, with everything, and most of all with my sisters.

I managed to see Bella during lunch time, but I didn't want to talk to her, and decided to stay with my friends. It's not like I had anything against my older sister. It is just that I didn't want to be seeking her for anything, and maybe, if I stopped needing her so much, I could keep my distance, and I thought it would be for the best.

I couldn't stop thinking about my individuality, not as a Black, but as Andromeda. I, who was a person, was nothing without my sisters.

Known to be "one of the Blacks" or "the only Black sister that was not in Slytherin." I didn't exist as a person without my sisters.

That was why I couldn't keep on going like this. I was my own person, and I had to be stronger, and make myself known as Andromeda, not just "a Black". I couldn't keep lowering my voice.

A hand moving in front of my face and it took me out of my thoughts.

"Andromeda, are you listening to me?" Said one of my friends.

"Yeah, yeah…" I hadn't really been listening to her. "What were you saying?"

"I said that McCory." (Who was Griffindor's quidditch captain.) " Was looking for you a while ago."

It had to be something about training, or this year's tryouts. Without thinking too much, I left my plate almost untouched, and stood up, walking to where McCory was standing.

"Ah, Black! " Again, Black, not Andromeda, plain Black. " Seeker tryouts are this afternoon, it'd be good if you came, I need most of the team to be present"

I almost didn't look at him, just nodded absently.

It was going from bad to worse. I had started the day full of vitality and I felt like it was all fading slowly, as the thought that I had to stay away from my sister to be myself begun to sink in.

I skipped the next classes, and spent most of the afternoon sleeping. I dreamt of me being me, and decided I was going to start the change. One step at a time.

Only the Evans girl was in the common room when I left for the tryouts, wearing my quidditch uniform, which had been locked up in my trunk since last year.

"Dromeda, why do you even bother having tryouts, if it doesn't matter who enters the team, you're gonna lose anyway? " His hideous voice was somewhat far, but too close to my liking. Muggleborn! My sisters would have called him something worse.

"Tonks." I was not all for smiling today. "I hope Peeves hears me and locks you up in some kind of un-findable room!"

He seemed to be heading the same way I was, and decided to join me, totally against my will, of course. Peeves be cursed! I don't remember exactly how, but I was trying so hard to keep my head higher than Tonks that I tripped over something and stumbled forwards.

Yet, I didn't hit the floor.

A pair of arms grabbed me just in time, and we stumbled together, leaning on a wall to regain our balance. Only the "wall" was a door, a door we fell right through, and ended up in some kind of secret room I had never heard or been before.

"Where are we?" Asked that stupid boy, who had just made me fall into an unknown dark room. Well, it hadn't been really him. Peeves was laughing hysterically on the other side of the wall.

"No idea, but I have a quidditch tryouts to attend to!" I almost screamed as I tried to open the door. " Muggle eyes!" I know it doesn't sound like a curse, but I was a pureblood after all, everything is possible.

"Eh? What?"

"The door's not opening." I tried using my wand. "Alohomora!" Nothing.

"God, you're useless, let me try." He pushed me to the side. "Alohomora!." But he couldn't do it either. Idiot.

"You muggleborns are just so weak…" I teased.

"not like your pureblood status helped you at all!"

"I can't stand you." I barked. I hated him. I hated him so much…

Tonks laughed in my face.

" know, I just love to mess around with you".

"You'll pay, someday." I murmured, frowning.

"Sorry?"

"It's Nothing."

We fell silent. We didn't talk, just stared at the room. It was…empty, like some kind of abandoned class. But the reason why the door would be hidden was beyond my understanding. Dumbledore was such a strange man!

"Hey, Dromeda." He spoke again." Why do you always speak so low? I can't understand half the things you say, and when you repeat them, I'm sure you don't say the same thing."

"I don't have to explain anything to you, of all people. " I didn't want to sound angry, I kind of liked the fact that he had noticed, but he was not someone I should give an explanation to.

"Of course, you only have to explain to your sisters."

That was low, even for him.

"I have a life apart from my sisters!"

"Are you kiddin'? Tell me someone in all Hogwarts that you are close to, apart from them. Someone you consider your best friend, or something like that girly stuff."

I tried to think of someone, but he was right. I didn't know anyone enough, and anyone knew me enough. I had friends, but nobody I could confide in."

"Well, I-"

"No." He cut in. " See? You need to talk to people, stop being so attached to your sisters. They're not the only ones that care about you!"

Did he just say what I think he did? Had he tried to imply that he cared about me?

"I'm trying, you know! I tried to stay away from them, but it's difficult. I want to be able to say what I think out loud! But it's just so…" I sighed, I was not going to cry in front of Ted Tonks, no way…

Then, something unexpected happened…I couldn't help the tears that fell from my eyes, not only because it was Ted Tonks hugging me, but because I realized I couldn't remember the last time I had been hugged. When Bella returned home from her first year at Hogwarts? No, I had hugged her then.

I felt myself gripping his shirt, leaning closer. I was falling apart in front of one of the most detestable creatures in Hogwarts, and I couldn't stop.

"See?" He whispered, when I regained control. "That's what happens when you don't speak to anyone. If you did, you wouldn't have all this stress accumulated inside."

Was he trying to make me feel better? Or was he really that stupid? Well, even Tonks could be nice sometimes, I guess.

"The best way of letting all the bad things go away is screaming…I'm sure that you'll feel much better then"

"What are you talking about?" He was not hugging me anymore, and I was somewhat grateful.

Then he began screaming, and I decided he was totally crazy.

"What the hell are you doing?" I spat.

"C'mon, scream! Maybe someone will hear it and will come get us out of here£

He was crazy and he kept screaming. He even seemed to be enjoying himself, and I couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, it could work for me, too.

So there I was, screaming, with Ted Tonks.

When Minerva McGonagall opened the door, she didn't show it, but I can assure that the shock of finding two sworn enemies locked up in a room, together, screaming, had made her totally loose her cool, for at least a minute.

"Five points less for each of your houses, for your lack of carefulness. Now go back to whatever you should be doing."

"Well, Dromeda, I'm going that way." Tonks said, once we were left alone again, pointing at the corridor that led to the Hufflepuff common room.

"And I'm going that way, Teddy." I answered, smiling with fake innocence.

"What have you just called me?"

"Bye, Teddy!" I waved at him and disappeared down the hall, towards the main door.

I felt much better, I was happy, somehow, and knew, even though I hated him, that I had found someone who I could trust.

I ran into some guys of the team halfway to the door. James had made it into the team and he was extremely excited.

"We're going to kick some Slytherin ass this year, Andromeda!" He laughed, looking confident.

"Save some energy for the others, too, we won't get too far just winning to Slytherin." I smiled at him.

We crossed paths with Narcissa on our way to the common room, but she didn't seem to hear me as I saluted her. She was looking at the floor, and seemed even paler than she already was. What was going on with that girl?

No, Andromeda .I reprimanded myself. You have to let go, enough to live your own life…

I thought of following her anyway, but it was too late, and I didn't see her again for the rest of the night.

Cissa didn't make it to dinner either, and I walked to the Slytherin table to see if Bella knew something.

"What now?" Asked Bella with tiredness.

"Nothing to me, and if it was the case, I would have taken care of it on my own.

Bella stared at me, seeming surprised for a moment, but she changed back to normal, composed Bella soon enough.

"Ok, what was it then?"

I asked her about Cissa and told her that I had seen her, and she looked like she had been kissed by a dementor. Cissa's soul seemed to be locked up somewhere and screaming like crazy wasn't going to help her.

Bella didn't seem to notice anything different about Cissa and told me to leave her be.

While making my way to my own table, Tonks waved at me from his table and I waved back. It was…comforting, somehow.

That night, I slept without trouble. Things were getting better, at least for me. So, the next thing I had to do was try to see how I could make them better for Cissa.

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_**Yuki Neko~~**_


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